14th Entry

Like Walking

You dubbed me as circus clown, and I
took that name without a frown.
The line's not red but at least it's thin, it's
on this rope that I dance and spin
for you, poet. I call you
by what you are, and you resent me
and this mess, this web - oh how
caught we are, how
hot you are when you stop talking,
stop stalking
the one who let you down.
What goes up is bound to be found
by nameless nobodies, and they won't say they're
sorry
'cause they're not, don't you see?

And do you like
walking, like walking
with me?

13th Entry

Flicker

You asked for my number every day
and forgot them in any and every single
way. You might lose your phone, or
wipe your card.
Perhaps you lost the paper, or the combination's too hard
to remember,
and yet you remember my
favorite seat in every cafe,
where I got my groceries or
takeaway, you'd come with me,
walk by me, and I liked this,
I liked the way you never tire of asking
"Lady may I have your number, please
(I lost it again, I'm sorry)" even though you
probably have it memorized -
just a little white lie, and you
do it with such poise.
It's the way you stand over me as I
drink my coffee, I'm no Sophocles, but I
appreciate your theatrics, bringing me my
sugar and
cream.

You sit down and I slide down, I
hide behind the coffee steam as you
ask for my number once again.
But friend, you don't see behind my
curtains, you're certain you know me,
but I wipe my face for you, I
drown myself to
sober my eyes, I
claw myself to
straighten my hair,
every day, for you, as my alcohol shallows and the
sleeping pills dwindles,
this is why I haven't invited over you yet.

You tell me your name on every day
and I forget it in any and every way,
over the whiskey, or 'cause of the pills,
because you love me and because love
kills.
Every night my life flickers by,
and, every night, I try to commit suicide,
suave stranger,
your kindness strangles me, you don't
see what I burden I can be.
Forget my number for the last time.

12th Entry

Discount Bin Singles

Our cases are cracked, our
plastic wraps have slacked,
and our cover art is creased.
Our shame will never cease till they
cart us to the trash, this is no
flash of insight, we've known this all along.
Such is the life of Discount Bin
Singles
by no-name artists and
faded stars -
it is past their prime, and we're
a dozen a dime,
you'll find us in the corner where no one goes,
nobody knows
who we are or
what we sing.
All we've got are the wretched things
on our see-through skin -
4 dollars special, in
bright neon green,
this is a tragedy we've never seen
and never heard.
We are not second rate, we're third.
We are both Discount Bin and
single, joined by what we are,
and yet so far apart.
Plastic, paper, and pseudo art.
We're the same, orphaned and trash,
dying in the same discount stash,
and yet we'll never be.

11th Entry

The Sky is Blue

It's summer and it's raining; the sky is blue
r when you close your eyes.
I let friendships die
'cause that's what friendships do.
Yes, I'll hold my (farewell) cup (of tea), I'm bold enough.
I sigh, and that's it.
We'll never meet again, friend, there'll be no love
lost if we stay away, the candle's lit,
I won't be missed as you move on with your
huge success. There's no resess for change,
there's no loitering on stage, but I'm not too sore
for what we've lost, 'cause losing friends is not so strange.
But I'm not comfortable, and I'm not consolable, I'm sad
though it's not too bad. At least I stood by what I still believe.

10th Entry

All Nights

His voice, juicy sweet, in -
vades the tenacitic peace of each of the iambic feet,
they're gone, and there's no coda to our
vodka sodas as he simmers away into the darkness, I'm
Cinderella and tell him I must go,
No see-you-laters, and no,
no, I won't want to have gone
with him after my seven glasses of jack daniels and coke iced,
won't regret each of my decisions, right -
they're right and I'm alone tonight,
and I’ll be alone,
all nights from now.